Feeling dramatic...

Okay, that is me 90% of the time. When I am not working or watching TV I am being dramatic.

I love my family... but last Friday, my Mom IMed me at work asking me not to come home last weekend. Which I did. I stayed home and spent Valentine's Day alone in the lonely confines of my efficiency apartment.

Fast forward one week. I have not heard from my Mom - a person I talk to every couple of days. She has not only been ignoring me, but my sister as well.

My friends (most of them children of divorce) have said that it is my Mom trying to be independent and is just going through a "phase". I guess I am not used to this idea of being cast aside. She may not view it as such, but when she is short with us and doesn't return our phone calls it feels like an absolute slap in the face. Do I drop what I am doing when you need me? Yes. Do I make an extra effort so you don't need to search for a babysitter? Yes.

Feeling this way has made me feel selfish and incredibly alone. Getting the cold shoulder from my Mom is more painful to me than a lot of things in this world I have been displacing my anger towards other people. I feel childish and ridiculous when I act this way, freezing people out, but it is what I know. It is how I cope.